These last nine months, I feel, have flown by. Once we found out we were expecting again, I feel that the next thing I knew, we were bringing our boy home. Our little boy, Oliver Dale. Born Monday, June 16th at 8:39 p.m. at 7 pounds, 2 ounces. We are truly blessed that he’s now a part of our family.
Although this past year has flown by, it was also the longest in the past nine months. Again, I say we are truly blessed because I know how hard it is for others to get pregnant. We both personally know couples who have faced a range of issues. Some stories have had happy endings, others have not. For us, if we were to have written out how we wanted things to go, it wouldn’t have been much different than it actually was to get to the point of having our family of four, with a girl and a boy.
Like with Rosalie, Leanne was scheduled for an induction a week before her actual due date. This is done as a precaution because Leanne fell into the high-risk delivery category. We were told that if the baby doesn’t come by the due date, it increases the chances of being a stillborn. With Rosalie, we went into the hospital at 7 p.m., expecting to sleep through the night and deliver the baby first thing in the morning, with the induction medicine slowly doing its thing overnight. Only, it worked too fast, and Rosalie was born just hours later at 3 a.m.
This time we went in at 7 a.m. and expected to be holding our baby by noon. We were so confident, we didn’t bother preparing anything like we did with Rosalie. Things like bringing games along to play, snacks to eat, and making out a whole birthing plan. Nope, we were pros and knew all that would be a waste of time.
How many of you scrolled back up to see what I said for the time of birth? I’ll save you in case you didn’t. 8:39 p.m. This time around, they gave Leanne a half-dose of what they gave her the first time around. We waited, and waited, and waited. At noon, I ran to the cafe to get lunch and be back as soon as possible, because it was about to happen. They kept checking Leanne throughout the day, and she really made no progress. They kept referring to the doctor about what to do next. Break the water manually, or continue to wait? They decided she wasn’t even close enough to break the water at 4 p.m. They eventually gave her a second half dose to move things along.
It didn’t. She still wasn’t dilated enough to break the water, so they gave her a different type of medicine in her IV that was supposed to help with that. At 7 p.m., the plan was to be able to break the water manually by 9:30 p.m., if it hadn’t already happened by itself.
Leanne wanted to use the Swiss ball to sit on, to help with the pain she was feeling with the contractions. It also helps by opening the pelvis to bring the baby down.
After about 45 minutes, Leanne’s contractions were even stronger and more frequent. At this point, Leanne was acting like she was in a lot of pain and felt that she was preparing for even more pain. The nurse left the room, and that was it. Leanne said the magic words, just like she did with Rosalie. “I want an epidural.” Before the CRNA could come to administer it, however, Leanne’s water broke, and things got very different after that. Leanne, through the pain, asked for the nurse. She later told me she was panicked because she could feel that the baby was ready to be born just as soon as her water broke. I pushed the call button, and Leanne hit me in the shoulder, telling me to “Go get the nurse!” I couldn’t, I was stabilizing her on the Swiss ball. The nurse comes in asking, “What’s the problem?” Leanne growls through the pain, “The baby is coming, right now!”
The nurse radios for the team to come in, and she grabs Leanne’s left arm. I swing around to the other side of the bed and help pull her back in. Nurses start filling the room, putting on their gowns and gloves, and wheeling in what I call the baby warmer. Not sure what the machine is really called. The machine they use to check the baby’s vitals, clean them off, and it has a built-in heat lamp to keep them warm while all this is happening.
That anesthesiologist wasn’t coming, again. We later joked that he was probably the same one for Rosalie, ready just outside of the door, with needle in hand, only to be told it was too late and his services were not needed, head hanging low.
After the doctor arrived, Leanne gave three hard pushes, and Oliver Dale was born. He was instantly handed to Mommy for the first few minutes while the team got to work cleaning out his airways. Just like Rosalie, things were nice and calm, and then they weren’t. Leanne is a champ for going through two births without any epidurals or pain meds, for that matter.
My parents and Leanne’s mom had gone back to our house for the night. I sent a text updating them on the birth of their grandson, but I wanted to introduce Oliver to them in person and tell them his name. They came first thing the next morning.
We introduced Rosalie to her new baby brother. We weren’t exactly sure how she’d react. The day before, the grandparents brought Rosalie to visit, while we were waiting, and I think the sight of seeing Mommy in the hospital bed with wires and a blood pressure cuff on, it scared her. She cried a little. But when I went out to the lobby to grab Rosalie and walk her back into the room to meet her brother for the first time, she was as sweet as could be. She was curious and gentle. I think at that moment, she understood who she was to him.
Rosalie picked up Oliver’s name right away. She says his name in her own special way. It sounds like, “Ah-ver.” She kept saying his name over and over. There was a point where I was walking her back out to the waiting room while she held my hand. When we got to the edge of the room, she tugged back and stopped. She pointed down the hall to the room we just came from and said, “Ah-ver. Ah-ver. Ah-ver.” She wanted to go back to the room to be with Oliver. So we did just that.
The one thing that worried Leanne the most about this delivery was getting Bell’s Palsy again. If you’ve had it once before during pregnancy, the percentage of getting it again is higher than for someone who hasn’t yet. Luckily, with Oliver, Leanne had no real complications that could have been an effect of Bell’s Palsy. Her feet didn’t swell up like they did with Rosalie. Her blood pressure stayed normal throughout the delivery, where it shot up to the dangerously high levels with Rosalie. We’re hopeful that she’s avoided it this time, although they did tell us that the chances are still there for up to 6 weeks after birth, then the percentage drastically drops.
We brought Oliver home on Wednesday, June 18th, just two days after he was born. We stayed longer with Rosalie because they wanted to continue to evaluate Leanne with her Bell’s Palsy and preeclampsia. My mom had gotten some “It’s a boy” balloons to hang on our mailbox and on the side mirror of my car. The neighbors have noticed and congratulated us.
One thing we wanted to do was involve Rosalie as much as possible so that she wouldn’t feel left out. We wanted to make her feel that her help is needed; and she’s taken on that role full force. She’s only 21 months, so she still lacks full communication skills, but she understands a lot. For example, I was changing Oliver’s diaper while Mommy was taking a nap upstairs. Since he’s recently circumcized, we have to use Vaseline. I had him on the floor, diaper undone, but forgot the Vaseline was on a small table across the room. I couldn’t risk letting him go, so I asked Rosalie to help. She was currently standing between me and the Vaseline. First, I say, “Go grab me the Vaseline.” And I point to it. But it’s far away, and there are a lot of things I could be pointing at. She looks, but turns back with her hand up like, “I don’t know.” I then start saying things like “On the corner of the desk. Next to your baby rocker. The box, with the lid. The jar. Waist high.” I have no idea if Rosalie understands any of these words, but I think she did understand “desk” because she then went over to it. I say again, “The Vaseline. The box with the lid.” She looks back at the desk and places her hand on the jar of Vaseline, and looks back at me. Me, giddy inside, knowing this was going to work, gave her a thumbs-up. A thumbs-up? Does she even know what that means? I then correct myself and say, “Yes!” and extend my hand. She grabs it with both hands and trots back over with a proud smile on her face.
The other thing I saw Rosalie doing, without any instruction from us, was attempting to put a diaper on one of her babies. She’s laid them down and covered them up with a blanket before. She’s also given them a bottle and walked them in a stroller. But she’s never done anything with a diaper. Her experience with diapers so far has only been from her own point of view as we put them on her. As I was walking back to the living room, I see Rosalie by the changing pad, placing a diaper down on it, opening it up, and then placing her doll on the diaper. She then folded the diaper over the doll, and that’s as far as she’d get. I watched her repeat this process three times before she realized I was there. It was the cutest thing, and I think she was practicing so that she could help change Oliver’s diaper.
We wondered if there would be any meltdowns of jealousy with Rosalie. We didn’t think that was going to be the case after we’d already seen her interact with him, but it did happen. For supper, Rosalie was sitting in her chair while Leanne brought in the baby swing that we used to put Rosalie in. Rosalie has since re-discovered this swing and likes to get in it herself. It’s low enough to the ground that she can do that. When she saw Mommy putting Oliver in her swing, Rosalie got really defensive and started yelling, “NO! NO! NO!” This set her off, and I had to go hold her down and rock with her for about 20 minutes while she calmed down. Big cries that led to coughing and sniffles, as she was having a hard time breathing between them. After that, we wondered how to proceed, because we needed to put Oliver down so that we could eat. Leanne held him for the next couple of meals. When we had company over for lunch, I figured I’d give something a shot. I squatted down to the ground with Oliver next to the swing. Rosalie was right there. I asked her if it would be okay if we let Oliver sit in the swing while we ate. Rosalie, again, shows us that she understands so much more than she can tell us, walks over to the side of the swing, holds it steady for me while I put him in, and pushes the buttons to start the rocking of the swing. The whole thing got to me. I turned to see if Leanne could see, and she was watching the whole time. All we had to do was ask.
Things seemed so much easier with just Rosalie. We’re learning how to take care of a toddler and a newborn together. When all we had to do was take care of one, it was easy to tag team. Now that it’s two against two, we can’t play zone defense anymore; it has to be man-on-man. Sometimes they set picks for each other and we have to switch who we are defending. No longer are the days when one can take a nap while the other easily shifts over to cover the open man. Leaving the lane open while it’s two-on-one would quickly break the defense. Sorry, tonight is game 7 of the NBA championship between the Indiana Pacers and the OKC Thunder.
Right now, Oliver is asleep for most of the day. We’ve seen his eyes open for periods at a time. He’s already able to see shapes, as I can see his eyes slowly follow motion around the room. We’re happy that Rosalie already loves her brother. We were worried she’d be jealous, or just dangerously clumsy around him, like trying to give him toys by throwing them at him. She hasn’t done any of that. She’s real gentle when she touches his hands and feet. She always goes “uh-oh” when he drops his pacifier and we’ve shown her how to gently try and give it back to him.
We couldn’t be happier with the family we’ve created. Ten fingers and ten toes on both, and that’s all we asked for. Truly grateful. I’m still planning on writing updates here on The Wood Log, but if you really want real-time, quick updates, you may want to follow me on Instagram and check out my “Stories.” I post there for everyone to see, but more for friends and family who want to see regular photos of the kids. If you have Instagram, head over to @DustinWoodPhoto and give me a follow.
